Tarakash Josh! : A website for Youth!

Completely wet with tears. Sweat running down my forehead. My long hair open and covering my face completely. Crying out in despair for the broken heart, which had no cure.

How clearly I could hear my breathing! Breathing heavily due to tiredness. My heart was beating faster and faster. Water was running out of my eyes and tickling down my cheeks. I clutched my dress as tight as I could; felt like tearing and pulling them off. Mind so depressed. My head paining, due to immense frustration.

I broke the still silence by giving out a loud yell. There was none to respond me back. There was none to come running to me to give me tight hug. There was none to calm me down. There was none to support me. That’s where I live. I live with no one but myself. I live my life with my SALVATION.

Again there was complete silence, except for my sniffing and crying. I felt something
on my ankle. Something was tickling me. I touched my ankle but couldn’t feel anything. Again I felt the wetness. Felt as if something was licking my leg. Out of curiosity, I raised my head to see what it was.

There was a small creature. It was very much contrast to me. She was a small and white.
She was so tiny and furry. She was simply so very adorable. She was a small cat. I don’t know where she came from. One glance at her and it melt my heart away. I nearly forgot what was happening. I took her gently in my hands and held her close to my face. I stared at her and she stared back at me. It seemed as if she was smiling at me. I hugged her and her touch made me realize a very special person to me. Her touch was equivalent to that of my DAUGHTER.

I got up and took her to the next room. I took care of her – gave her milk, comfort, love, care. What was so special about her? After all she was just a cat. How could she revive me back from my salvation? How could she bring me out of depression? How could she bring back that same love and affection for life, which I had lost somewhere few days back?

I asked these questions several times to myself, but didn’t get any answers. Whenever I looked at her it made me remind of few beautiful memories of past. I got comfort and peace that night.
I slept peacefully with calmness and even without sleeping pills.

I slept for long hours. I got up in the morning and my eyes only wanted to see her. My wandering eyes did not relax till I found her sleeping next to my feet. I was quite worried on not being able see her. She was sleeping so peacefully. I took her in my arms and cuddled her. She gradually opened her eyes and started licking my face. I gave kissed and let her free. She stretched out lazily and ran towards the kitchen.

I fed her milk and biscuits and helped my self with some coffee. Later on I got ready and we left house to head towards supermarket. I had nice time with her and each moment made me remind of someone so very special to me. After many days I felt that happiness which I had lost somewhere in the past. I felt as if I had forgotten to smile. She was a reason for me to smile.

It was evening when we were on our way back home. We were on one side of road and house was on the other side. I was holding her in one hand while the bags were in the other hand. Suddenly, she just bit me and ran out of my hands towards the other side of road. It immediately took me to some flash back …

The situation was same…but time was different. The place was same ……..but people were different. The feelings were same…..but experience was different. How vividly I remember when my daughter left my hand and ran towards the house. She neither reached home, nor did she come back to me! She was crushed under a truck loaded with grains. This all happened before my eyes. How hard it was for me to accept the death of my very own daughter! The only person, whom I loved so UNCONDITIONALLY, left me, leaving behind nothing but only salvation. That day was the most unforgettable day of my life.

That cat was none other than the resemblance of my daughter. She came, just to fill in that empty space of my life with few colors for a brief time. Each and every moment with her made me remind of my one and only loving daughter. She was one and only sign left with me of my beloved LOVE. And……

And that was the end. No one comes back after they are gone. You are only left with their memories – sometimes good, sometimes bad. That’s how life treats us, without any mercy… Leaves us in hands of destiny and there we go on without any ending or meaning to our life.